Wasting money

I should clarify; in my eyes, I'm not wasting money but considering the economy some would definitely call it a waste: I'm investing cash on my home network.

It started off as a simple task; stream media from my computer to my laptop. Initially, I figured I'd go the cheap route and get a wireless N router: no thought, just run out and get wireless N.

What I ended up getting was a single band router with a 100Mb switch. Needless to say, the little improvements I found were quickly tainted by new problems. It was a situation described simply: I rushed into a purchase and didn't get what I needed.

Fast forward a year and a half and now I'm ready to tackle the problem again. Unfortunately, I didn't internalize much of my last experience: all I remembered was that it didn't work like I had hoped.

So now, I figured I wanted something that was top of the line. I was looking at the sleek Asus routers but the limited speed on the 5Ghz frequency bugged me. That and the fact that reports said their new router was on the way that corrected these issues.

A visit to Fry's helped me realize the Netgear N900 accomplished everything I was looking for. Again though, I didn't assess my present network so I wouldn't be able to take advantage of the speeds at all.

Playing around with the router, I found out that my cables didn't even support 1Gb transfer speeds. That bothered me mainly because I had recently purchased a bunch of ethernet cables. Turns out I had bought Cat5 cables. On top of that, my laptop's wireless card didn't even support the 5Ghz frequency so technically I had nothing that would even be running on the wireless N band which I had found out the year before with the other router but had forgotten. Anyway, I ended up spending 60 on new. Cat6e cables, 40 on a wireless card for the laptop and eventually I'll be needing a 1Gb switch as well which will run in the 100s. So, excluding time, I'm already at 300 spent with nothing notably awesome.

I will say though that it was cool installing the card into the laptop. I had to install an antenna myself. I've already clocked double the speed on the laptop, maxing out at 100Mb, the maximum transfer  speed my computer can manage with Cat5. Also, I would have never realized I was using older cables had I not had the N900.

Though the ultimate goal had been to be able to stream movies from my computer to a wireless laptop without jitters, it's now evolved into having a topnotch network so if I need to transfer anything, it'll be blazing fast. Lol, now that I think about it, the N900 probably doesn't have USB3 so there's one lingering bottleneck I hadn't considered. Either way this thing goes, it's been a great learning experience.

Abandonment issues

Everyone eventually feels the sting of being abandoned by someone they love for the first time. Mine came at the hand of my own dad during his futile pursuit for "happiness". Suffice it to say he got more than he bargained for.
One thing is certain, until I was directly confronted with this, I never once imagined the level of selfishness needed for someone to do such a thing let alone their affects. You could imagine my surprise when someone nonchalantly summed up the feeling of resentment whom I believe hasn't gone through what I have. I thought either the person has gone through some sort of abandonment or is very in tune with the emotions of others.
The first thought is what interests me. Could a person experience such hatred for selfishness simply through relationships? The answer should jump out at you as a yes: any emotional arousal is still a valid experience no matter how trivial their affects would seem to an outsider. This wasn't an obvious conclusion for me. My personal bias kept me from recognizing it as what the sentence was; a brief intimate moment into their life. I have to remember to keep this in mind more often. There's nothing worse than opening up to someone and having them take your emotions lightly.

60h Banana Fast

So far so good. I've got too much energy for my own good. It must have been all the exercise I had done a few days ago. Either way, I'm shocked at how well I feel although I only ate a few bananas and drank little water. I do feel like eating but not because I'm hungry. The idea of eating is appealing but to be clear, I've eaten a total of 6 bananas in 2 days and have yet to hear a stomach grumble. Makes me wonder...

32h Banana Fast :P

So, the second my girlfriend came in, I got the feeling that she wouldn't be very supportive so I decided to switch to the banada fast.

After Activity - 25h

I walked to the Pete's Market today and came back with two bags of groceries and a gallon of milk. I'm not getting that shaking feeling I normally get, though, I feel a lingering remnant of it. I hope that I gain some energy back.

Fast 18h

It was hard to get to sleep. I didn't feel hungry but I couldn't sleep. As of right now, I'm pretty hungry but I don't have much a desire to eat. Hope I don't become irritable.

Urine: Yellow
Breath: Worse than usual

Water Fast - 6h In

So, I've decided to go on a fast. I'm not sure whether I will go ahead with the full water fast or go with the banana fast but what I do know is that 6 hours into it is already proving to suck. I can't imagine how it'd feel to be actually starving... I don't know anyone who has.

If I decide to bail on the water fast and do a banana fast, than my banana fast started yesterday at 11p, or 1d. We'll see how this goes.